inspirational · lessons learned · relationships · thoughtful · Wellness · womanhood

Marriage is a pretty cool thing. And challenging. That too.

Monday, we meet again.

I had a really great weekend, and I am sad to see it go, but hey—it’s a new week, so I have new chances for awesomeness! Friday night was our ritual night for Hawaiian pizza and movie or show marathons. I love, love, love nights when our whole fam piles onto our couch and gets cozy. It is seriously what melts my heart most.

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Saturday I got up early, committed suicide in the form of Pure Barre, and then got cleaned up so that Benny and I could go out and about. We had some coupons we had to use or lose, so we visited Target, DSW, and Ulta.

I’m excited that I got some much needed new foundation and eyeliner. I’ve been really digging the Tarte brand because they advertise being cruelty free, not to mention they also skip out on a lot of the dirty dozen—toxic ingredients often found in cosmetic products. I’m slowly transitioning to healthier cosmetic products where I can, and I’ll be excited to report on my newest Tarte products after I’ve gotten to give them a spin around the block. I also ordered some Colourpop lip kits because I’m eager to see how they shape up to the Kylie ones. Look forward to more on the beauty front in the near future!

Saturday night was spent huddled up with bowls of my slow cooker chili and more movie and television cuddles. Sunday was low key as well: I taught an early Pure Barre class, did some housework, bought groceries, and got some take out in celebration of our three month wedding anniversary.

Yep, we are that lame couple. I think it is important to celebrate the baby steps though because life is hard, and society’s structure throws a lot at marriages. A lot of marriages fail. So we seek to nurture ours by acknowledging the little steps and seeing them for what they are: progress towards possibly the greatest adventure we will take!

While we were eating dinner, I asked Benny what he thought of marriage. “It’s kind of hard, isn’t it?” I followed up with.

He told me he thought marriage was a really cool thing. He said he enjoyed it more than dating because when you marry someone, you can’t be about your own agenda. Everything is working together towards common goals and helping each other along the way. “It’s a team. And I love being on teams,” he finished as he ate his boneless wings that really just look like chicken nuggets.

Y’all, I wanted to cry, and in part it might because my REAL wings were spicy, but also my husband just said “marriage is a really cool thing,” and I just hope in another three months he still thinks it’s rad.

All truth, cuz I ain’t a liar: I think marriage is hard. I love it. But it’s challenging for me.

Benny weighed in on this saying he thinks that I find it difficult because getting married, moving in with him, becoming financially independent, and starting my career all happened at once for me; whereas for him, it’s been a little more gradual.

He’s right. Life slammed me with a lot of amazing things simultaneously. I am incredibly grateful for all that I have. I just sometimes feel overwhelmed with the different hats I wear trying to give my all to each aspect of my life.

I am very much an independent person, as Benny points out to me often. Which makes the teamwork concept a little difficult for me. I’m learning, slowly albeit, that it is okay to let my team mate take care of some of the items stressing me out on my to do list. He won’t do it the way I do, but it is okay. I repeat, for my inner self sitting in the back with her fingers in her ears: it is O.K.

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So that’s where we are at three months into our marriage: it is really cool, and a little challenging. If we continue to develop our team strategy, I am confident that it’s only going to get COOLER.

What little bits have you learned along the way of a relationship? It’s interesting how the two parties can have such different perspectives! Refreshing!

 

[W]IT GIRL

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